Are you in control?
Our primal instinct is to always feel and be in control. We have different levels of control, and this purely depends on the individual background and experiences, but to make it simple, let’s generalise and say, we are conditioning ourselves to know what is coming next.
We want to feel comfortable and safe.
We want to know what is coming next because we LOVE what is familiar to us.
We want to know when we will be paid, how much, what we will eat, how much we will eat, what will be discussed in the meeting, what is required from us, what our family think of us, what your partner thinks of me, when will we meet the partner of our dreams, where we are going on vacation, what we will do, what cake we are going to have on our wedding, when we will have kids….etc
You see we just love to know!!! Some of us even obsess about it.
We also know that our brains are flexible, and by repetition, we are conditioning our minds to do and believe certain things. Most of these things we don’t question because why would we? Since it is working for us, there is no need to question it…. right?
So with time, we are building habits which are unhealthy and make us miserable (like watching too much TV, browsing to many social media, eating unhealthy food since everyone is doing it, feeling shit about ourselves), as well as building habits which are good and make us happy (like preying, meditation, taking time off, eating salad from Monday-Wed, going to the gym twice a week)
Again, the one main role of your mind is to ” Keep you safe. Do familiar things and feel comfortable”
Many clients come to me and we spend time discussing how our brain works, and one of the main misconceptions of all time regarding brain and the mind is as following, sorry I will say it again:
“ Your brain’s job is NOT to keep you happy, is to keep you SAFE & COMFORTABLE.”
It is not the role of your mind to make you happy; it is your own social responsibility.
It is up to you through your free will to decide if you are going to be happy, how will you live, with whom you are going to spend your time with. It is a decision, which ultimately you will have to make at some point in your life. Most of us decide so quickly and unconsciously, that we don’t even realise that this is what we have done.
So, to be sure where you are in your life, ask yourself a question:
- “Are you fully in control of your life?”
- Are you making yourself happy, fulfilled, and satisfied and are you truly happy with your progress?
Your brain will always keep you safe, and in control. That’s its role.
You decide if you are happy, healthy, sad, or depressed.
We can’t control anything except our own minds, the direction of our life, and how we react to the situations which are happening in our lives.
